something that I've realized on february 16, 2021 (y, y & o)

I know how everyone says it's pretty damn risky to have an opinion about things early on. Well, every once in a while, whenever you get one of these feelings, you just have got to risk it and see whether it will actually turn out the way you expect it to. Usually, these feelings are about love. It almost always starts out with two people believing they have found the one. Usually, the people around them warn them about not getting too caught up and even though it is usually coming from a good place, they might be wrong. Knowing this is what keeps people risking everything, even after life having shown them the exact opposite in the long run. People fall in love and eventually get frustrated in the end. This is how it goes, almost always...

"Almost" always... It's that "almost" in there that motivates people to try over and over again because they think, "Wait, what if this time - THIS TIME - I have actually found an amazing person who I could share my life with, so why risk losing out on something great?"

... When statistically, they will ultimately be disappointed, again and again. That must mean that it's worth risking a lot, because even if the stakes are low, the endgame could make it all worth it.

I am not going to lie, of course I have been doing this myself too. Everyone has done it, at some point or another. Everyone has fooled themselves that this one person could actually be it...

But you know what I've come to realize at age 21? It's that friendship is a safer bet and it sure as hell is much better than betting on love. Now don't get me wrong, love is great and all - and it's pretty damn exciting too... And I will bet on it once I come across someone like that again.

But tonight, I am not talking about love. Well, I am. But it's a different type of love. I am talking about friendship. And scratch what I just said about friendship being a safer bet because well, true friends are pretty damn hard to come by too.

Which brings me to the three people who I am damn lucky to call my friends. They are the kind of people I would want to have around me for as long as I live and breathe. LOOK - I am not trying to get all sentimental here... And please do not tell me that I am predicting something way early on and that I might be all wrong about this in the end. Just please, DON'T give me that. These guys are amazing, each one of them in their own quirky way.

Who knows how long any one of us will live so maybe it's a good thing that I am writing these feelings down right now. Because they will not be reading this tonight, tomorrow, or any other day - but if I were to die, I think they'd find this. I will make sure that they do. (Hi guys! djfdkfhjk) Okay, so just a few things I would like to say to you...

Yakup. Thank you for the being the older brother that I never had. Thank you for always looking out for me and for all of us for that matter. And also for being a damn good friend. I know that I can always count on you and that I can talk to you about anything, and know for sure that you will listen... Finally, I just want to say that your drivenness/decisiveness has always been something that has inspired me.

Oktay. You know the one thing that I absolutely love about you? It's that you always have these comebacks at almost anything I say. Does it annoy me? Yes. But do I love it? Hell yeah. I don't appreciate people who correct me on everything but with you it's different. Because when you do it, it's like a challenge and I love people who challenge me mentally. It's also because I know that what we have is pretty damn real. So thank you for that.

Yunus. Where to start... God damn it, I love you so much. I knew from day one that I would always, always want to have you around. You just might be the best person I have met during our years at the faculty or maybe even my whole life. You are smart, kind, pretty damn witty and an amazing friend. And I just can't wrap my head around how someone can manage to be this amazing. Thank you might seem like two little words but I guarantee you, right now, they mean everything. So thank you.